Monday, November 21, 2011

Unforgotten Blessing

I have a super cool job, I'm just going to say it from the get go. One of my favorite parts is that we offer limited ultrasounds to clients who qualify to check for gestation (how far along) and a heart beat. During these ultrasounds, I get to sit in the room and shadow, and even though my presence is a legal requirement to protect the patient's rights, I get excited anyway because I get to watch the excitement and see the surprise over such a little life! Most of the time these ultrasounds are a moment of realization that there really is a baby growing and it can already do so much.
However, every once in a while the ultrasound does not go as planned. The couple I shadowed today was so excited to see the baby and even though she thought she was 10 weeks, the baby was only measuring at 7 weeks. Everyone thought she may have just miscalculated when she got pregnant, but as the ultrasound went on we realized we couldn't find a heartbeat. It was SOOOOO overwhelming to watch this heartbroken couple mourn the loss of their child. I found myself pulling my cardigan over my belly to make my own pregnancy bump seem less noticeable. Somehow it felt like bragging just to have such prominent proof of the life growing inside me that would no longer grow inside of her. 
Even though I know that statistically 1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage, it was still surreal to see a couple's first, raw emotional response to the news. I found myself praying and praising God that my baby has lived. Today gave me a renewed thankfulness and appreciation for the miracle God has given me. We prayed so long for this baby and after we passed the initial high risk miscarriage stage it has been easy to see that it was only by his hand that we are going to be blessed with a baby in May.

So today, I lift up his glorious name and humble myself in thankfulness at the foot of his throne for even considering me worthy of such joy.

"My prayer was for this child; and the Lord has given him to me in answer to my request."          
1 Samuel 1:27

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