My Best 154 Days

A friend of mine recently posted about Taylor Swift's new song "Ronan" which she wrote about a little boy who lost his battle with cancer at the tender age of four. I, of course, couldn't help my curiosity (even though I know these types of things make me an emotional wreck for hours/days afterward) and googled the story. I found the blog written by Ronan's mommy, Maya, where she had penned the story of her sweet boy and his hard fought battle. I read all about her love for Ronan and her guilt that she couldn't save him and her genuine belief that even up until the very last second, they would receive a miracle. Then (just to torture myself) I looked up the video of Taylor Swift singing the song at the Stand Up 2 Cancer benefit. Taylor (we're on a first name basis) had taken bits and pieces from her conversations with Maya and excerpts from her blog and composed a song from Maya's point of view. She sang of ghost memories of Ronan still dancing in the house and how she could still feel his hand in hers and of the moment she gave him permission to let go. And most importantly, she sang about how lucky she was to have even gotten a single day with him, singing, "You were my best four years."

I was already sobbing from reading the blog (I only made it through 1.5 posts and one picture of sweet Ronan) and this really sent me over the edge. I'm talking, kneeling on the floor and praying to my sweet Savior to hold this family close. I just prayed over and over again that he would bring them comfort and thanked him for my little blessing asleep in the next room.

It seems that since Titus became a part of our lives these stories are happening more frequently, although I'm sure they happened before him. I just have a heightened awareness now because as a mommy you cannot help but think, "What would I do if that were my sweet baby?" When I was pregnant a couple that is in Community Group with close friends of ours lost their toddler in his sleep with no explanation (Hill Family Blog). Another couple lost their baby at 23 weeks pregnant after already knowing the gender and having the name picked out. My Facebook newsfeed seems to be covered with Pages dedicated to precious babies who are fighting or have lost their fight to different syndromes and diseases. Most recently, some good friends of ours delivered their baby early due to complications and our gracious Lord has given her the chance to live (Kaundart Family).

Half of me screams AVOID! AVOID! as soon as I see these stories, but the other half quietly whispers "Life is but a breath," and reminds me to cherish every second I have with Titus. There are so many moments that we were not promised and yet we were given anyway.
Moments like when we were finally able to get pregnant and he grew big and healthy in mommy's tummy. When he was born and his arms flailed around wildly and his lungs filled with air. The first time that he smiled and his eyes changed completely, like they learned how to glitter. When he first used his jumper and his tiny world was filled with joy. The many times he has snuggled into my chest when he is sleepy. His old man laugh that is so infectious. All the bath times where he has kicked his feet and surprised himself when he splashes water in his face. The moments he stares at me with his big blue eyes when I'm feeding him like I am the only person in the whole world.
All of these are gifts.

Titus has been with us for 154 days now.
My best 154 days.

5 Month Update

This has been the first month that seemed to have less than 30 days! I can't believe how quickly we got to you being 5 months old...

Dear Titus,
At five months...

• You eat 6oz every 3.5-4 hours (about 25oz a day)

• You weight about 16.5 lbs

• You sleep unswaddled in your crib from around 8:30-7:00 (10-11 hours)

• You still wear size 2 diapers, but wear size 3 diapers at night

• You are ticklish! And sometimes you have a deep belly laugh that sounds like a grown man :)

• You are in a phase where you scream when you get excited. You think it's so funny! But you also scream when you are bored, tired, hungry, mad, happy, talking.... You are just really loud in general (surprise!)

• All daddy has to do is look at you and you start laughing! You think he is the funniest person ever (but mommy still gets the most smiles)

• You LOVE your jumper. You can't reach the ground yet, though, so we have to put a box under your feet.

• You are in the 30th percentile for body and 70th for head size...

• You have started jabbering a lot and practicing new mouth noises

• You are doing a bit of teething so your favorite toy is your Sophie Giraffe from Aunt Katelyn. You chew on that thing (as well as fingers) non-stop!

• You figured out how the mirror works and you laugh at yourself when you look at it. You must think you're pretty funny!

• Your eyes are settling into a deeper blue than mine. You may have even less genetics from me than we previously thought! :) But they are beautiful.

• You are doing these belly crunches when you lay on our laps because you want to sit up on your own. In time, sweet boy!

• You are really great at standing (with help) and you love to do it all the time!

• You finally have a nap schedule for the most part (yaaaay!!). You take 2- hour and a half naps (usually around 9am and 1pm) and then a shorter catnap (30-45min) around 4-5pm. You almost always nap in your swing (you still won't nap in your crib).

• You are closer to wearing 6 month clothes than 3 month, but they're still a little big on you.

• You have really started noticing Bosco and Lucy and love to watch them wherever they go.

• You have started cuddling into my chest when someone makes you smile like you are bashful. It is the cutest thing ever and makes your mommy feel so loved!

Titus James you are adorable! The older you get the more like your daddy you become. You love watching football and you are LOUD :) I love that you are like him already but I pray that you would grow to be a man of God like he is. I pray that you would be a faithful and serving husband to your wife one day, that you would be a respected leader in your community who is known for being wise and just, and I pray that you would prize the Lord above all else. You are so lucky to have your daddy to look up to and I hope that you will be just like him one day... with maybe just a little better clothing ;)

 Reaching for those toes!

This is your typical stance: always doing crunches trying to sit up on your own! 

Using my Fancy Camera

Almost 2 years ago I got a nice DSLR camera for Christmas and I was SO excited! At the time, we were trying to get pregnant and I knew I wanted to have a nice camera before the baby arrived (which wasn't for another year and a half). I started practicing my photography skillzzz on everything- the dogs, flowers, cards I'd made, anything I could get my hands on. At first, I was OBSESSED with figuring out all the fancy tricks and vocabulary that came with this new hobby. But the more I researched, the more confused and overwhelmed I became. It seemed like no matter how much I researched and asked around, I just couldn't get my pictures to be at the level I wanted! So I gave up trying to be the "oh hey, it's no big deal, I'm not a professional but my pictures look great anyway" kind of photographer and settled for being the "I use my auto settings and I'm okay with it" photographer.

Fast forward to today. Titus is here and I really do want to have great pictures of him. I take pictures that are probably better than people who don't have a DSLR, but they're definitely not where they could be! I stumbled across this blog that finally broke down all the fancy terms in a way that I could begin to understand (written by another DSLR newbie). I was so excited to try out her tips and tricks! Lesson one was aperture, which is basically how much light you let in through your lens (aka, how to make the background look blurry). The general idea is that lower aperture keeps one thing in focus and blurs the background, while higher aperture brings the whole picture into focus and gives everything detail.

The homework for this lesson was to shoot a line of objects started at the lowest aperture setting (3.8 for my camera) up to the highest (25 for my camera) and noticing the difference. I set my camera to Aperture Priority, which just means that everything else (white balance, ISO, etc.) were on auto and the only thing I was changing was the aperture setting.

So here is my homework assignment for lesson 1:

Did you notice that at 3.8 only the first apple is in focus and by 22 the apples, tablecloth, and chairs are all being brought into focus?

Cool, huh?! I knew the jist of aperture before this, but all the numbers were just overwhelming. This assignment helped to make it feel a little more manageable and I'm excited to try out the next step, shutter speed!

DIY: Overlapping Frame Wall

I've been thinking about this project for a while. Of all the new house projects it took the least "artistic ability" and the most "artistic eye." It mostly involved me finding random little pieces that I thought were cool (like wrought iron keys or a metal bicycle) and buying/refinishing old frames. I really love the finished look!

Here are the supplies I used:

• Old frames from thrift stores
• misc. decor items (smaller than the frames)
• nails
• optional: paint, finishing stain, sandpaper

Step 1) Find frames to hang. I got 5 or 6 at thrift stores for probably $5 and then refinished some of them to make them look vintage (painted them, sanded them down, used finishing stain to make it look old).

Step 2) Find objects you want to place inside the frames. I used wrought iron keys, clocks, poetry, misc. crafts I made.

Step 3) Decide where to hang the frames. Don't be too neat! It's meant to look hectic. I LOVE the look of the frames overlapping, dare you to try it! 

To make the frames overlap just place your background frame where you want it and nail plush to the wall. Then position your foreground frame that you want to float and put nails in as well, but make sure you don't nail them in very far so the frame can be hung an inch or so off the wall (I had to get longer nails for the floating frames).

Step 4) After you have placed all your frames start filling with random stuff! I only bought a couple items and then just tried to grab stuff from around my house that I already owned.

DIY: Reupholstered Chairs

Project: Reupholstered chairs

Here is a project that I thought would be way more complicated than it was. We inherited a beautiful dining room set from my grandparents but unfortunately the cushions were torn and stained in some spots. I had seen lots of tutorials on recovering chairs, but I had never done anything with fabric before and it was really intimidating. But alas, being poor finally forced my hand as buying new furniture was just not in the cards :)

Supplies needed:

• Staple gun (I ordered one off of Amazon for $9.99, and it included staples and a case)
• Fabric (I got mine from fabric.com for like $7 a yard + free shipping!)
• Drill

Here are my chairs before:

 and my chairs after!

Step 1) Use drill to remove screws from the bottom of chair and take off cushion

Step 2) Line up cushion on fabric and make sure you cut out enough to reach about 1-2 inches around the back so you have plenty of room to staple it to the bottom

 Step 3) Remember where your screw holes are!!! I took a marker and poked a hole then circled it so I would be able to find it again (don't worry, this will be covered up by the wood and you won't be able to see it.

Step 4) Pull fabric very tight (works best with one person holding fabric and one stapling) and staple one side to the cushion. Then do the same thing with the opposite side of the fabric. Make sure that if there is a pattern (mine was chevron) that it is lined up straight before stapling the second side.
Step 5) Staple the other two sides and staple the corners last. Since I am not a perfectionist my folded corners were pretty sloppy, but it didn't matter because no one sees the bottom of the cushion.

Voila!

DIY: Chipboard Canvas

Project: Chipboard Canvas

This project is SOOO easy! Seriously, anyone can do it whether you're artistic or not. I made it as a wedding present but I'm about to make a really huge one for our dining room.

Here are the supplies I used:

• Two 17x20 canvases (got them in a 2 pack for $7.99 at Hobby Lobby)
• Different sizes of wood or chipboard letters (I used chipboard, WAY cheaper)
• Craft glue
• Spray paint

I didn't take pictures of each step, only the finished product because it really doesn't need a photo explanation.

Step 1) Pick your quote and decide which words you want to be which size. Then buy the amount of chipboard letters needed in each size packet.

Step 2) Lay out the chipboard letters on your  canvases and make sure you like the flow.

Step 3) Glue down letters and press to canvas (I kept re-presssing mine every 10 minutes or so to make sure there were no corners left up. I even added a little extra corner glue to some letters). Let glue dry overnight.

Step 4) Take your spray paint (goes on much smoother over the letters than acrylic and doesn't leave clumps of paint in between letters) and spray 2-3 coats (until the canvas and chipboard are the same color)

Step 5) Enjoy the fruits of your labor!

DIY: Mercury Glass

Lots of projects are in the works for our new house! I have been so excited to have a whole new crop of crafts to dive into since we moved. Here's a snapshot of a few that I've done in the past few weeks.

Project: Mercury Glass Vases

I wanted to do a collection of vases and flowers for a dining table centerpiece, but regular vases were too boring! So I looked up how to create your own mercury glass and voila! Something special.

Supplies Needed:

• Lots of vases
• Krylon Mirror spray paint
• tape and paper

Step 1: Buy vases at a thrift store (I probably spent $6 for like 15 vases)

 Step 2: Wrap outside in paper (so paint won't drip down the outside)

  Step 3: Buy Krylon glass spray paint (chrome or silver spray paint is not the same)
Step 4: Spray the inside of the vase with a water bottle (this is what gives it the dirty/vintage look that is specific to mercury glass)

Step 5: Spray the paint on the INSIDE of the vases and then place upside down to spread out paint and dry. Repeat a bunch of times (I did it like 4-5 times)

Here is the end result!